He Liked Her. She Liked Him. He Thought That Was Enough to Keep Going.

One of the men I worked with had a pretty simple way of knowing if dating was going well.

He liked her.

She seemed to like him.

They had chemistry.

Conversation was easy.

She wanted another date.

Cool. Keep going.

Honestly, that makes sense.

But after we started talking about the women he was meeting, something stood out.

He could tell me why he liked her.

He could tell me what he found attractive.

He could tell me the signs that she was into him.

But when I asked:

“What are you learning that tells you she would actually be a good partner for you?”

That answer was harder.

He had not really been thinking about it that way.

If they liked each other and nothing felt wrong, he figured that was a good reason to keep seeing where it went.

And sometimes it was.

But liking each other was only part of the picture.

He still needed to learn who she was.

What kind of life did she want?

How did she handle stress?

How did she treat people?

What happened when she was disappointed?

How did she talk about relationships?

What did she actually want from one?

He did not need to turn dinner into a job interview. 😂

He just started paying attention to more than chemistry and whether she wanted another date.

That changed things for him.

Sometimes he liked a woman and wanted to keep getting to know her.

Sometimes he realized:

She is attractive. She likes me. We have fun together. And I still do not think she is right for me.

That was new.

Before, mutual interest felt like a green light.

Now, it was just a reason to keep learning.

He could enjoy the date.

He could enjoy the chemistry.

He could be excited that she liked him too.

He just did not have to decide too much too soon.

Liking each other was a good start. It just was not the whole decision.